


Naked Cooties

by crazycatt71



Series: Mandatory Funday [10]
Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Humor, M/M, Nudity, mandatory funday, winterhawk - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:54:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 639
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21959182
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazycatt71/pseuds/crazycatt71
Summary: Clint spreads his naked cooties
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Mandatory Funday [10]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1437526
Comments: 8
Kudos: 53
Collections: Mandatory Fun Day





	Naked Cooties

**Author's Note:**

> For Mandatory FunDay  
> Some of the ideas used came from a dicussion on the winterhawk bingo discord

Clint didn’t know if he should be insulted when Kate walked right past him to the fridge and didn’t say a word. She continued to stare at her phone as she grabbed a carton of juice, pouring it into a glass Clint got out of the cupboard and held out to her.

“You’re welcome.” Clint grumbled as she took her glass and left the kitchen, never looking up.

Bruce shuffled in a few minutes later, rumpled and half asleep from an all-night science binge.

“Hey, Clint.” He mumbled, reaching past Clint for a coffee mug.

“Hey.” Clint replied, grinning as the scientist filled his mug, then turned and shuffled out of the room.

Tony came in next, glaring at the tablet in his hand and talking a mile a minute to Jarvis. He set his tablet on the counter, took the mug Clint held out, and reached for the coffee pot, freezing when his hand brushed against Clint’s thigh.

“Holy Albert Einstein!” he yelped, jumping back. “Damn it, Birdbrain, you almost gave me a heart attack.”

“Morning, Tony.” Clint said.

Tony looked Clint over, realization slowly dawning on his face.

“You’re naked. In my kitchen.” Tony yelled, waving his arms around. “Why are you naked in my kitchen? Why is your naked ass sitting on the counter, in my kitchen where I can see it? Now I have to burn down the whole kitchen just to get rid of your naked cooties. I mite have to have a lobotomy just to get the image of your naked ass out of my brain. Do you know how much genius will be wasted because I saw your naked ass in my kitchen and had to have a lobotomy to get rid of the image?”

Clint just laughed at Tony’s rambling.

“Tony, what’s all the shouting about?” Steve asked as he came in.

“Tony waved his hands at Clint, sputtering, “Clint’s naked in the kitchen and now I have to burn it down to get rid of the naked cooties and all my genius will be wasted because I have to have a lobotomy to get rid of the image of his naked ass.”

Steve looked at Clint and shook his head.

“Nobody is burning anything, Tony.” Steve said, grabbing him by the shoulder.” And you are not getting a lobotomy, I like your brain just the way it is.”

Clint made gagging noised at the lovey coo Tony made.

Steve glared at him.

“Clint, nudity is inappropriate in the kitchen,” he scolded. “we prepare food in here.”

Clint just shrugged and started to take a drink of his coffee, only to find his mug empty. He grabbed the pot and refilled it.

“Steve, his naked cooties are contaminating the coffee.” Tony whined.

“Hey, Buck, come get your boyfriend out of the kitchen.” Steve yelled.

Heavy foot steps and grumbling could be head approaching the kitchen.

“What did he set on fire this time?” Bucky asked as he came in.

“Jeez, you cause one teeny, tiny kitchen fire and nobody ever lets you live it down.” Clint grumbled.

“Babe, you almost set yourself on fire last week trying to make Ramon.” Bucky told him. “You’re a menace in the kitchen.”

Clint crossed his arms over his chest, pouting.

“Right now, he’s a naked menace, spreading his naked cooties all over my kitchen.” Tony complained.

Bucky shook his head, grinning as he walked over to Clint.

“We talked about this,” he said, “you’re not supposed to be naked in the common areas.”  
“Fine.” Clint grumbled, hopping off the counter. “If you all can’t hand all this,” he gestured at his body. “I’m going back to our rooms.”

He stopped in the door way.  
“You coming?” he asked without looking back.

Tony groaned, Steve laughed, and Bucky just smiled as he followed after Clint.


End file.
